Buying the Cow

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May 17, 2007

On A Possible Explanation

As a follow-up to my last post here's a bit of possible history according to some Biblical Scholars. Before you send me hate mail, I DID NOT make this up, I just report it.

Setting: A small building in early Biblical times. Abraham kneels praying to God for a son, as he's been doing for many years now.

Abe: God, I'm faithful, please honor me with a son.
God: Okay. Yea, you're right, you've been faithful. You'll have your son. As a bonus for making you wait, your son will be special. Revered above all other faithful. How's that sound.
Abe: Sweet. Thanks, God.

Abe to himself: Wait a tick, I'm REALLY old, and so's my wife. How can we have a son? God must have made a mistake. I think I've still got it in me to have a son but I doubt she does. I gotta find someone younger.
(Abe spots a maid nearby)
Abe: Hey there! Wanna come to my place and view my etchings?
(She follows him home, there are no etchings)

(A bit later)
God: Abe!
Abe: Yes God?
God: When I said you could have a son I meant you could have a son with your wife, who you promised to honor forever, foresaking all others. You remember that little bit right?
Abe: Well, yea, but I figured I'd hedge my bets with a younger gal. Hope you don't mind.
God: I mind. A little tip: When the Creator of the cosmos tells you to do something a certain way, you do it that way, without your own private spin on things. Got it?
Abe: Yea I got it.
God: Further, your son by this maid will not be honored. He'll be cursed, and his offspring will be cursed, and their offspring will be cursed, and down the line for all eternity. They'll be warlike and never know the true faith of God, though they'll think they do. But to show I'm not completely heartless when it comes to you, I'll give you another shot at a son. With your wife this time!
Abe: Seems kinda harsh, but thanks for the second chance. What are you going to call this race of peoples my accursed son will create?
God: Muslims.

Posted by at May 17, 2007 08:11 AM

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Comments

Posted by: Aaron at July 27, 2007 07:44 AM