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| Image: Chico Police Department
"Incidents" in April 2009. In April there were 10,341 calls to Chico's dispatch office. 1,271 were fire related and 9,070 police related. The dispatch office handled 2,075 of the calls. This left 885 for the fire fighters and 7,381 calls to be handled by police officers. Most of the fire department calls were also serviced by local ambulance companies. The mall security teams did not back up the Chico PD. Breaking the PD calls down comes out to 246 officer responses per day, or ~11 per hour, or roughly a response every 5 or 6 minutes. That's a lot of driving around and getting in adventures. There have been 15 rapes in Chico this year, with 1 in April and 6 in March. 64 assaults occurred from January through April with 14 last month and a monthly high of 19 in January. In the horse race of which month received the most of any crime April did win the burglary category with 60. May even came in first in auto thefts (31). And that month is only half represented in the report I'm citing. Drunk in public and simple assault also seemed to be growing sectors of our crime economy this year. The seedy underbelly of Chico seems mean, volatile, and drunk. I'm longing for the old days of Craigs-list style prostitution-as-massage after seeing the numbers above. Actually, my favorite incident type listed above is "Mental". 1-Chico-12 this is dispatch, we've got a report of a guy dressed in a bird suit running backward down highway 32. He's obviously mental in public. The citations written for April include speed laws (46), public offenses (71), and registration/sales (50). I'm not sure what public offenses are, but I'm guessing this blog is probably one. "Mr. Glazner, you're being cited for presenting information not normally provided to the public, and data they are not prepared to understand. In addition, the gratuitous use of cleavage in your lemonade stand marketing is a public offense." I assume that Chico's Police Department has a lull in some activity now that the college students are gone. They can probably spend less time traversing Burning Divan Drive. There's no need to be circling Drunk Co-ed Court. And service calls to Help Me, My Kegger Got Too Big Avenue should be reduced. So except for responding to attempted rapes, rapes, attempted murders, murders, simple assaults, complicated assaults, assaults with a deadly weapon, and assaults and pepper they've pretty much got the summer off. Just like teachers. I'm looking forward to seeing some of you tanned and well rested officers down at 1-mile this weekend. Let's get mental! |
| In Your Eye: Evan
Tuchinsky's In
My Eyes column today deserves a read (see
here). Possible names/slogans for the new Bidwell Park group he suggests
include... Group Names: Amigos of Bidwell Park (to encourage our latino population) Park Lovers United (but not in public, there are kids around) Al-Qaeda (for a gentler, kinder, group of park advocates) Trailblazers (also a pro-smoking group) The Outsiders (what a clever name) Slogans: I moved to Chico and all I got was this hu-normous park Preserves are for picnics Come have your soil compacted Friends don't let friends join "Friends" groups Do tread on me Hangliding is not a crime, oh... yes it is, but it shouldn't be |
Crime Scene
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Lon
About Me: Fasten your seatbelts for an exhilarating trip through Chico's public policy; I guarantee it's marginally better than public access TV.
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In honor of a great 80's classic movie, Ghostbusters:
"The Gate Keeper"
Just one question...who is the Key Master?
D
Love the CNR editorial. LOVE IT.
Question though dear forum readers . . .what does CARF mean?? And where all the hillarious (and not so hillarious) domestic disputes?? That is always my favorite part of COPS on Fox.
CARF?? I'm guessing child abuse something or other. Since it differentiates between physical and sexual it probably related to child abuse.
You think Cops is good, try Cheaters for good old fashioned family fun. Togther they give Reno 911 a run for the money.
And yes, Evan did a good job. Send him an email patting him on the back.
Lon
Oh -- then CARF is at the bottom of my list of crimes. I guess the old fashioned domestic disputes must not be aggregated together, but are seperated.
Cheaters is pretty funny stuff. Let me give all those people who call Cheaters a nickel's worth of free advice: If you think that your signifigant other is cheating enough to call Richard Grecko they are in fact cheating on you. Get yourself down to the club ASAP to find someone else. . .
I love Reno 911. It's so real. The first episode I ever saw was during that long, hot, frustrating summer of budget meetings. It was about how the city of Reno was broke, so they had to let the local Hooters sponsor the police department. so they had to have pink squad cars, and they all had to wear pink short shorts. Now, where's that kind of imagination in Chico?
Rayneesha is my favorite character. I can only aspire to a butt that big. Think it's real? My husband swears it's a prop.
I have never seen Cheaters, but I think I watched a few episodes of COPS before I realized it was supposed to be serious. They had the one guy who wouldn't pull over because, as they discovered, he was dressed in drag and he didn't want anybody to see him. So he led three or four cop cars on a low-speed chase for about 5 minutes, all the while the cops talking to him on his cell phone, promising not to show him on tv. I guess you just can't make that stuff up.
Whenever I get a rental application, I google the applicant, see what I can get. My Space is one of the handiest tools available to the landlady, it is amazing what the little turds will post on their My Space. One of my other favorite sources are the cop reports. I found one prospective tenant had got so drunk she thought someone had stolen her atm card. The ensuing conversation with the dispatch operator, during which she listed the contents of her purse, including her atm card, was a laugh riot. At some point the operator says, "wait, did I just hear you say, 'atm card'?".
I love this town. Let's make up our own TV show!