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March 28, 2006
Schools Are Often Like Families
Sunday night I received a phone call from one of our district superintendents. Every once in a while I get a phone call at night or at 4:00 AM. They're usually about kids getting caught breaking into a classroom or someone wanting to know if the buses are going to run if the roads are flooded. Those are not necessarily difficulut to deal with. Certainly they are not fun, but the issues can be dealt with, a decision or two made, and we move on.
Sunday's call was not like that. The superintendent was calling to tell me he needed help at his school the next day. A student had been killed earlier in the day. The details were still sketchy, but the whole community would be reacting and on Monday he would have schools full of upset children.
He's right. I've been through some of these before. I never anticipated it when I went into education. I thought my job would be the love of teaching joyful, happy kids. Mostly it is, but I have found that things happen. Choices are made. Consequences occur. Accidents happen. I don't like it. I can't control it, but it's there nontheless.
What I have found is that schools often become an extended family especially in small communities. Teachers and principals become mom and dad for the day. Counselors listen and grieve too. The situations are never easy. It takes everyone's effort, but academic school stops while other learning and healing take place.
When we stop, help, listen and heal with our kids, when we do that together, all of what we feel and know becomes integrated into what we learn to do to take care of ourselves, each other, and ultimately to live fuller, richer lives.
I'm so sorry about the loss of a child, and I am always so moved by the way people respond when something like this happens. Thank you for being there, for being family.
Posted by Dr Joni at March 28, 2006 07:20 AM