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April 21, 2007
Mom Flunked!
This week I was talking with several Moms about what to do with their kids in school. One was lamenting her sixth grade son's lack of involvement with anything other than basketball. She was about ready to string him up. The rest of the group was giving encouragement and suggestions. We talked about several other topics, but the evening's topic was report cards and assesments. We finally got around to those two, but only after the other pressing matters were out of the way.
On the topic of assessments, we we discussing tests and test taking. We had talked about being prepared and studying. We had gone over getting a good night's sleep before a test and making sure to eat a good breakfast. They'd all agreed it was better not to have stressful discussions or decide to move or some such upset beore taking tests. Of course, part of the discussion was around the upcoming state STAR testing.
We had been talking about testing for a bit when one of the Mom's told a story about her recent test taking situation. It seems she was taking a class for work, and there was a required test at the end. She studied and studied. Her children watched her studying. Her two-year-old, a nocturnal child, sat on her lap until two in the morning while she going over the material. Obviously this was something important and she wanted to do well.
The night before the test she tried to get in every last minute of cramming she could before the big day. She stayed up half the night, and thought she was ready.
When the results came in she had not passed. Her boss told her he was really surprised. She'd studied so hard, he thought she'd be okay. She, of course, was disappointed but undaunted. She could take it again. Afterall, 80% of the people who take this test don't pass the first time. She'd do it again.
Now our Mom was okay, but her daughter wasn't. Her fourth grade daughter was truly concerned. Mom had failed a test. She actually flunked. What was she going to do? My guess is, she was also asking how does it feel to fail a big test, how do you act, what do you do when that happens? Will you live?
I was very impressed with Mom's reaction. Iit was such great modeling for her daughter. Yes, you're disappointed, but you did everything you were supposed to do. You went to class, you studied, you worked at it, and this first time you didn't get all the answers right. You're going to have to study more, work some more, and try again. You don't give up. You don't quit. You don't get mad or blame someone else. You just go back and do the work until you get it.
What a great message! What a great message for her daughter, the rest of her family, her co-workers, her boss, the group of Moms for the evening and me.
I'm definitely looking forward to the sequel to this story next time I see her. I want to know if she passed and what it means for her job, but more importantly how her daughter reacted to her extra efforts.
Posted by Dr Joni at April 21, 2007 09:42 AM