His & Hers: In Loving Memory of those at Virginia Tech
Featuring guest writer: Jordan Frazer
Last Monday there was no His & Hers published because we honored a day of silence in memory of the shooting at Virginia Tech. Jordan and I had a hard time deciding whether or not to participate in this day of silence, because it seems that activism and discussion are the best ways prevent this from happening again, and to help us all heal from this horrible event. And yet we did not want to disrespect the memory of the people who were killed. In the end, we decided to observe the day of silence, but we also wanted the opportunity to share with you what we thought about this tragedy, so we are writing about it this week for His & Hers, in Loving Memory of those at Virginia Tech.
He Said:
What impressed me about the VA Tech incident was the reaction of the people closest to the killer. While the media seems intent on focusing on the fact that a person with a psychiatric history was able to obtain and use firearms I place the blame elsewhere. Even if the killer had a stockpile of guns, explosives, and heavy ordnance this tragedy could have been prevented? How? Simple involvement by the people who mattered.
In a Fox News interview one person closest to the killer stated through tears, "It was so obvious that he was going to do something like this. I mean, he stalked women, wrote dark stories and poems, and implied that he planned an incident like this." If it was so
obvious to this person why didn't she do something about it? Why didn't she call the police or other authorities? She admitted she did nothing.
Cho Seung-hui had a history of stalking women and making threatening comments. A couple of people did notify professors or the University Police but later dropped the charges in fear of hurting Cho's feelings or retribution. While this is upsetting, what is more upsetting is that the Police departments didn't follow up on complaints after the
charges were dropped, after all, there were several complaints.
Apathy by the masses is the easiest way for evil people to commit their terrible acts. It opens the door for tragedy. Nobody cares until the evil is affecting them. A classic quote was by a church leader living in Nazi Germany who said, "First they went after the
Poles, but I didn't care because I wasn't Polish. Then they went after the Jews, but I'm not Jewish either. I was upset when they went after the Catholics but didn't do anything since I was Protestant. When they came after me I cried for help, but everyone who could help was already gone." It's our responsibility to speak up when we suspect something is amiss. That inner voice is usually right when it tells us that disaster is just steps away.
She Said:
Virginia Tech was such a disastrous event, marked by a great and lasting suffering for many people affected by this tragedy. I feel fortunate as an American, because we live in a community where a tragedy of this magnitude is felt by the entire country. We all mourned this event and were saddened by this loss. Unfortunately, the mass media is aware of this mourning, and sometimes jumps to exploit those who are affected to boost their ratings.
I, like many Americans, was glued to the internet the hours and days following this shooting. Reading about Cho Seung-hui, his activities before the shooting, what people were saying about him, his background information, anything they published on him. I was searching for a reason why. How? And was there some way it could have been stopped.
Many people jumped to blaming the school. But if you honestly think about it, what could the school have done differently? Sent an e-mail about a shooting they felt was a domestic disturbance in the dormitories? Ok, but would students who were already on their way to classes have gotten this e-mail? Should they have shut down the entire campus because of this incident? And how would that have been accomplished? By sending everyone out of classrooms and onto the campus, making for easy targets? Or by locking students in classrooms until they figured out what was going on? But Cho was a student as well. And what would the media have said about the school administration if the shooting had turned out to be just a domestic disturbance, and they locked down the school… overreaction?
My point is simple, this boy was crazy, he was determined, and he had slipped through the cracks. We could play “what-if” until we’re blue in the face, but he would have figured a way around it somehow. In the face of tragedy when we sit and place blame on the victims of the situation we miss the real point. The questions we should be asking ourselves is what could have been done to prevent him from getting this mad? Why did he feel that killing people was the only way to solve his problems? Why was he so angry?
Instead of focusing on who did what wrong and when, why can’t we focus on stopping it from happening again? And how could we do that?
Men and women throughout the ages
Have had diverse points of view
Hers is this, His is that
Which one works for you?
Jordan Frazer is the author of the blog Buying the Cow. He is a 27 year old resident of Susanville, who survived the dating scene and got married about 18 months ago.
His & Hers: a male vs. female point of view, appears every Monday right here at iconoclastic
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