I love food, in fact, it's my favorite thing to eat! Like most Americans, I try to eat light and to eat for nutrition. And like most Americans, I don't try hard enough. This whole weight thing is a battle I have slowly been loosing for the last thirty years. I exercise, I don't eat meat, and I rarely eat junk food, but my weight keeps increasing by about three pounds a year. That may not sound like much but when you consider it's been going on for over thirty years now, that puts me about 100 pounds heavier than I was when I was in my late twenty's.

I have become very familiar with the cycle of accommodating the expanding waist line. One day you realize that all of your pants are getting too tight, so you decide to buy just one pair of the next size up. You don't want to buy too many of the larger size because you know that soon you are going to loose ten pounds and the new pants will be too big as you once again feel comfortable in your old clothing. At first you need a belt to hold up that next larger size and you like that, because after all, this isn't really your size. Next you realize that these are the only pants you seem to be wearing because they are so much more comfortable than all the older smaller size pants you have, so you go out and buy a couple more pair. Pretty soon your closet is full of new and larger size pants, and to make more room on your shelves, you take all the older pants that are too tight and put them up on a higher shelf, the one you use for storage. The last part of the cycle is when you realize you no longer need a belt to hold up the bigger size pants you have been buying for the last three years. Then the cycle starts all over....you go out and buy just one pair of the next larger size pants.

The storage shelves in my closet has piles and piles of pants and shorts from years gone by. Although I have long ago gotten rid of my 32, then 34, then 36 inch waist pants, I still hold onto my 38's sincerely thinking I will need them again someday. Every time I look at the piles on my upper closet shelves, I say to them, "Soon my friends, soon", but that day never seems to come. My fear is that if I get rid of them it will be the same as admitting defeat.

I know what the next step is in this nasty cycle. It's when you keep gaining weight but no longer require larger size pants. Why? Because our asses and hips quit growing. At least that's how it is for men. The problem is, our bellies never quit growing, we just wear our pants under our bellies as they begin spilling out over the waist band.

And to add insult to injury, we have to put up with skinny 30 year old "experts" on weight control tell us that we just need to eat less and exercise more. Never mind that I have been doing stomach crunches and exercising everyday since high school, that I only eat candy at the movies, that I have salad coming out my ears, and my feet are flat from thirty years of running on hard pavement. I just need to exercise more and eat less. I have just one thing to say to those 30 year old "experts"....talk to me in thirty years. Lets see what you look like once your body has the metabolism of a rock.

But here's the thing....Although we may be loosing the battle, we can't ever give up. I know that once I give up, three pounds a year will turn into 15 pounds a year. Besides, the exercise and good diet keeps me healthy and limber. Actually, I know what I have to do to loose weight because I've done it in the past. The idea of it is frightening. It means 45 minutes on the treadmill instead of twenty. It means riding my clunker bike up Old Humboldt Road three times a week. It means no candy or snacks at the movies, in fact, not anywhere, anytime, ever! It means no eating after dinner or between meals. It's pure hell, but it works. Problem is, once you loose the twenty pounds and your stomach is flat, after three months of hard work and sacrifice, you decide to have just one pastry at Star Bucks and bingo....you gain all the weight back in like 10 minutes!

But you know what I like better than losing weight?....getting off that treadmill after twenty minutes, a great big Kit Kat bar and large Pepsi at the movie theatre, and a glass of chocolate soy milk at bedtime. I mean, I must because I seem to choose those things over having a flat stomach. Sure, I like being thin and I honestly believe I will do it again....soon....any day now....In the meantime, anybody know where you go to buy moth balls?