Breaking News...this just in from Nick Freitas: The ultra-new conflict resolution method known as "Flame Out" has been suggested to ensure a peaceful end to the current crisis in California
Several liberal activist groups have opposed "fighting" the fires. Apparently fighting is not the answer and will only perpetuate more "fire fighting". *** The groups have called for more dialog with the fires in order to arrive at a peaceful solution.
“Emergency Fire Conflict Resolutionists” are being jet-setted in by Al Gore who has generously agreed to shoulder the burden of carbon credit costs with Guvna Awnuld.
Special note to Nick, I've heard this program always brings firefighters home...is that true?
That is absolutely correct.
These groups insist that they "support the firefighters, just not the mission"
They have also called for equal rights under the constitution for those fires that have been brought under our control.
They are also calling for an investigation into rumors that fire fighters have resorted to "torture" in order to "put out" the fires.
Methods such as "fire breaking" have been called into question. One spokesman had this to say:
"Fire breaking is a dastardly procedure where by a firefighter will cut down trees, remove foliage and essentially rape the land in an attempt to prevent the fire from advancing. These sort of tactics are exactly what the fires are counting on! If we resort to the same methods the fire uses, we have become no better than the them, and the fire has already won!" Douglas Typicallib
More to follow...
This just in:
A group of women calling themselves "CODE RED" have been spotted outside of fire stations in Berkley. Holding protest signs and screaming "Stop the illegal fire-fight NOW!" the elderly women claim they are prepared to camp out there until the unnecessary fire-fight is stopped.
It's an obvious case of racial profiling. Why are they always picking on the red flames?
House Speaker Nancy Pelosi has called for the registering of all lighters, matches, flint and steel in an attempt to more closely regulate commodities which lead to fire.
She has also proposed a "windfall profits" tax on Zippo and Bic.
Since Libby hasn’t commented, I can only assume she has been busy writing her congress people to support their endeavors to stop this "pointless" fight against fire.
I know the local community college has a "Fire Science Program” Where young men and women are indoctrinated into this practice of fire fighting and enticed with the hope of obtaining employment as paid "firefighting" mercenaries. They are armed with an arsenal of hoses.