Mom can't believe its not butter
I think I might stop calling my mom for cooking tips.
I have this really awesome cookie recipe. It's a little
different than normal chocolate chip cookies because the dough cooks down
and makes a crispy cookie.
I had some around the house and Mom liked them, and asked me for the recipe.
Mom called and said she had used the cookie recipe, however it didn't turn
out too well.
When she looked a the recipe she saw that it called for two sticks of butter.
When she thought about actually eating two sticks of butter she got grossed out.
So she decided to use "I Can't Believe it's Not Butter," the kind that comes in the tub,
not the yellow spray stuff we use for popcorn.
"They turned out gross," Mom said.
"Well, of course they did," I said.
"Well, I thought it would be different, but I didn't realize it would be that
different," Mom said.
"Mom," I said in a condescending tone people should not use with their
mother, "if you could cook with that stuff you would probably have heard about it.
There would be recipes in magazines for cooking with "I Can't Believe it's Not
Butter."
Mom agreed.
But why she didn't just stop with that one mistake, I don't know.
She said the first batch was all runny and got all crispy when she cooked it.
She didn't want to waste the rest of the dough, so she tried to salvage it by
adding more oats to the mix and baking the entire goo in a Corningware dish.
It never did cook up right, and really didn't taste like cookies,
but she was taking a nibble here and a nibble there.
I suspect that mess likely just made it into the garbage. Or, if she was a
little bit evil maybe she threw it over her back fence for the neighbor's dogs
to munch on.