By Heather Hacking, Chico Enterprise-Record
I’ve become a bit sneaky about feeding the kitty. My beau is adamant that dry food will adequately provide sustenance to the Feline Unit. If the cat wants meat she can go catch a gopher or a mole, he argues.
The only reason to have a few cans of wet food in the house is to reward her for deliverance of a gopher or mole, he has said on more than one occasion.
He has known the cat for nearly a decade, and she’s an excellent hunter, he says with annoying authority.
I argue that she’s getting older and wet food might be better for her system. A good quality, gravy-covered cat food can’t be terrible every once in while, if only as an addition to the dry stuff.
I would love to say we have agreed to disagree. The reality is that I have a secret stash of wet food packets that I reach for when I see his car turn the corner in the driveway.
The result is that the cat loves me more.
Our secret wet food bond would be all well and good except she is too dense to keep the secret.
If I’m washing dishes she’ll circle around my ankles, looking up at me with wanton “I-want-wet-food” eyes.
My guy knows what’s going on.
“You’ve been feeding her wet food,” he has said on more than one occasion.
I usually avoid the discussion by saying nothing.
Even I have grown tired of the cat’s lip service. If I wanted an animal that yapped at my heels every walking moment I would have chosen a Chihuahua.
The Feline Unit’s new attentiveness is insulting. She isn’t rubbing my ankles to thank me for gently removing burs from her fur. The feigned purring at my feet is gluttony, pure and simple.
My boyfriend is right.
I still believe feeding cats wet food is OK. However, her lack of discretion makes it impossible to continue our cat-and-human conspiracy.
This week my guy was working late.
I had fed the cat wet food the day before and a few spoonfuls remained in the little foil pouch.
I could indulge her in one more wet food moment. She could savor those final few spoonfuls. But after that she could live with kibble.
You can imagine how this went. She licked the plate clean but knew something was amiss.
“MORE!”
“MORE,” she said clearly, circling my ankles as if she adored me and only me.
“MORE,” she pleaded meekly, as if she surely was starving.
“MORE,” she demanded, as if I owed her something for being soft and small and beautiful.
Her obvious attempt at manipulation strengthened my resolve.
I would follow my boyfriend’s suggestion for a change and only provide wet food as a reward for specified rodents.
There were a few more expressions of her dissatisfaction, and the cat left the room.
I was typing away at the kitchen table when I heard a loud rustle through the cat door.
I didn’t look over. I was sick of her lip, and somewhat busy in thought.
Thump, rustle, clump.
When I finally acknowledged her, I couldn’t help but notice she had a particularly large pocket gopher in her mouth. She looked me straight in the eyes as she relished her moment, depositing the still-warm carcass on the hardwood floor.
After several minutes of high praise, I opened a new foil packet of wet food.
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