I need to stop buying delicious and beautiful fruits and vegetables from the farmers market. I do this every year. I stroll while I’m hungry and end up with a fridge filled with really good eating intentions.

This season, I’ll also blame the cruise ship. During my family’s recent jaunt to Alaska, I consumed (quite possibly) tens of thousands of calories in the form of drizzled chocolate, toasted hazelnut and creamy coconut. After gorging night and day on treats, my body was so saturated with sugar, it’s a wonder ants did not find me in my sleep.

The day I disembarked, I craved spinach and antioxidant berries, and stocked up on zucchini, carrots and kale at the farmers market. For several days, I bought and ate healthful foods like my life depended on it.

Then the tomatoes in my garden spurted a big batch. Next, the seedless Thompson grapes were discovered along my cyclone fence.

On the cruise ship, I experimented with whether one could overdose on chocolate, meringue and lemon curd. (I lived). Can you OD on Vitamin C from fruits and vegetables?

Easy food preservation

If I were a more generous person, I would have donated my excess produce to a local charity. Yet, this thought did not occur to me until I sat down to write this column.

When I brought some baskets of tomatoes to share with my mom, sister and niece, I ended up coming home with a big bag of ripe figs.

Next, I put a lot of thought into how to preserve all this summer overstock to overindulge later in the year.

Tomatoes and grapes are both candidates for freezing. In the past, I would wash grapes from my garden, freeze them in snack-sized plastic bags and add them to fruit smoothies.

Tomatoes can also be frozen (www.bhg.com/recipes/how-to/preserving-canning/how-to-freeze-tomatoes/) to use in marinara sauce in the winter. To prepare them for freezing, cut a cross in the skin (for peeling later), then dunk the fruit in a pan of boiling water for 1-2 minutes. Scoop them out quickly and place the red rubies in a bowl of ice water. Once they’re cool, you can easily slip off the peels and pack the tomatoes into freezer-friendly plastic bags.

However, it’s so hot right I doubt even Rachael Ray would bring water to a roiling broil if she lived in the Sacramento Valley.

These days, my air conditioner is burping and gurgling to keep up with the heat.

It’s so hot, I don’t want to run the washing machine and dryer. I would rather wear my clothes a second time and spray them with fabric freshener.

Despite the heat-induced brain fog, I remembered the food dehydrator I tucked away above the silent washing machine.

When I ran the extension cord out the dog door in the laundry room, I could run the dehydrator from the back porch. If possums came to nibble on the fruit overnight, they put the lid back.

Now I have yet another dilemma: Can I keep from eating ridiculous amounts of super sweet Thompson raisins, dried “tomato candy?” and semi-moist figs?

Compared to ice cream, dried tomatoes are a calorie bargain (www.calorieking.com/us/en/foods/f/calories-in-fresh-or-dried-vegetables-sun-dried-tomatoes/oLWxrY79QIubABfRXBA6oA) at 139 calories a cup. Raisins pack more paunch at 433 calories a cup. However, just a few on my morning oatmeal probably won’t ruin me for my size 10 jeans. Dried figs are delicious when nibbled with a cup of coffee.

Also, I’ll be teaching again in a week or so, and on my feet for at least 10,000 steps a day.

My guess is that dried tomatoes and raisins will be a big hit among my students, if I find it in my heart to share.

I’m in a bit of a bear’s breeches dilemma. Several weeks ago, I bumped into the plant and had an overwhelming attraction to its tall, mauve and handsome pillars of flowers. If you’re a plant geek, you know how it is: Your mind starts whirling with how you’re going to have this new prize your own yard.

For some reason, really great things have been happening lately. The latest was that I received an email from Larry. Larry invited me to visit him and his wife and pick up a pot filled with small bear’s breech plants, Acanthus Mollis.

Larry reminded me that he gave me a Daphne odoro a dozen or so years ago. I did not remind him that I somehow killed that plant (more details on that later in the column).

When I arrived for my undeserved prize, I could not overlook my new favored plant as I walked along Larry’s side yard. It’s huge! Three of the leaves, when watered and given ample sun, could cover my kitchen table. He had more in the back yard — huge clumps of oversized leaves and their tall columns of flowers. What’s nice about the flowers is that they dry out, but don’t wither. The white petals remain attractive, much like hydrangea.

I thought this gift was beyond gracious. But Larry also threw in a potted sago palm and a 12-pack of Vinca rosea that just happened to be popping up in his yard.

Thank you Larry. When my yard is beyond bursting with bear’s breeches, I’ll pass along the gift to someone else.

I think gardeners need to do their share to contribute to the economy of local nurseries. If we don’t, we won’t be able to leisurely browse plants on those days when we want to avoid cleaning the shower.

Yet, when I shopped around for bear’s breech seeds, most places wanted about $1 a seed ($5 for five). Some online seed catalogs were out of stock.

This week I visited my friend Michael, and saw my new beloved in his front yard. How I had overlooked those beauties the previous 10 times I had visited Michael, I may never know. He said he trims them back to nubs when they look ratty over the winter, and the large leaves grow rapidly once the weather turns warm. They’re growing at the base of a 15-foot tree.

I gathered more than a dozen seeds, and may be back for more. Maybe I should start selling these seeds online for 50 cents each, and finance a future trip to Ireland.

With seeds and potted plants in hand, now comes some tricky contemplations.

Did I mention these plants are mammoth? Most of the places for “very large” things are already filled in my yard. I could divide Larry’s plants and torture them in pots. Or I could simply put the new plant in the ground and let it battle with other greenery for territory.

As for the seeds, I have some time to think this over.

The Home Guide on SF Gate says planting the seeds takes some planning.

The soil needs to be prepped in early spring. The seeds need time in the soil before temperatures rise above 45 degrees. We can only fantasize about the days when the temperatures will be below 45 degrees. In the meantime, I need to stash Michael’s seeds in a place where I won’t forget about them next year.

Next on the seed planting guide is soaking, waiting and thinning.

My final dilemma with this plant is what to call them. The University of California Master Gardeners of Sonoma County website calls it “Bear’s Breech,” singular. Other places call it “breeches.” Both, of course, refer to a bear’s behind. I’ll call it breech for now, until I get multiple flower stalks.

Daphne

I tend to learn things the hard way, and this was the case with the Daphne mentioned above. After my first Daphne mishap, I received some great info from John Whittsley, the mind behind Canyon Creek Nursery. He explained that Daphne is susceptible to life-threatening bacteria when watered on days when the temperature reaches 89 degrees. It is a delicate balance to keep the plant alive during summer. For this reason, it’s also important to keep adding compost to the soil, so that good bacteria can help fight the battle.