Posted by Jack
A new holiday: In 2016 Vermont’s former governor, a Democrat, signed a proclamation rebranding Columbus Day to Indigenous People’s Day. The state’s current governor, Phil Scott, has continued the tradition. Now, the state is one signature away from abolishing Columbus Day altogether and permanently recognizing Indigenous Peoples’ Day — a trend gaining traction in blue states, as progressive Americans come to grips with the incredible harm caused by Christopher Columbus. His actions in 1492 would eventually lead the new world into slavery, wars , global warming, fracking and the exploitation of cheap Hispanic labor by rich white men.
Another new holiday: 420 Day – celebrating marijuana. So, light up today at exactly 4:20 pm because this is the highest of high holy days for marijuana smokers. Marijuana Day or Weed Day, whatever you want to call it, people are kicking back and smoking away this day.
The day has become synonymous with smoking weed over the years to the point where it’s basically a national holiday. That’s only getting bigger as pot legalization becomes more and more widespread; which has nothing to do with a national increase in schizophrenia, despite what medical research will try to tell you. One of the many reasons to get high today is to avoid being traumatized by the fact this is Adolf Hitler’s birthday and the day that the Columbine High School shooting took place! If you don’t have any weed to help you cope I am told that there will be crying closets available at CSUC for the rest of the day.
More good news: A poop map is now available for touring San Francisco so you can avoid walking in the most slipperiest areas! Hurray for progressives! San Francisco has basically decriminalized pooping on public sidewalks, the city does not prosecute people who are caught doing so. Also good news is the fact city workers make more than $184,000 a year in salary and benefits for cleaning up the public poop!
The current Mayor London Breed told NBC: “There’s more feces than I’ve ever seen!” Really? I wouldn’t expect anyone to have seen much poop unless they worked as a CNA in retirement home? Anyway…public pooping is up 400% and people now call the city 65 times a day to report poop. There were over 15,000 calls in 2018. This is good news for job security on the poop patrol!