Bjorn with a bjorn (bjorn means “bear” in Swedish. Alas, this photo did not make it into the church directory.)
My husband and I took professional posed pictures for the first time this week for our church directory.
We missed out on engagement pictures because I wanted a photobooth at our wedding more. Besides, my husband is quite the shutterbug and almost every single day of our courtship has been chronicled and posted on Facebook (of course.)
So I was a bit taken aback at what happens with this sort of thing.
First up was the magnitude of effort in coordinating outfits. We made a special trip to the mall. We hunted through racks and pored over hangers. We couldn’t find anything that we both liked, so we ended up getting a strawberry Julius instead (which happily, does go with every outfit.)
Later we discovered we already had coordinating clothing in our wardrobes that we both liked (of course.)
I was also amazed to discover that though I felt I was placed in the most awkward positions possible — my head tilting unaturally, my limbs askew — in the pictures it looked perfectly natural.
But perhaps the most surprising thing I discovered at the photo shoot is that my husband can not sustain a smile without emitting strange noises.
Hitherto, our previous photo-taking opps had taken less than 3 seconds. In an alien position for an extended time, my husband began leaking sounds that sounded halfway between laughter and a warthog rooting around in mulch.
“Hueh-hueh-hueh-hueh,” he breathed directly into my ear. I was woefully unprepared for this auditory attack, so of course I burst out laughing.
Our photographer was a bit puzzled, but then delighted at the expressions coming to light. “Great great great!” she said.
The pictures tell a different story.
Sigh. A lesson for next time.
Jammie Karlman is the entertainment editor for the Chico Enterprise-Record. Contact her at firstname.lastname@example.org. Follow her on Twitter @JammieKarlman